It's been awhile.
I wanted to find the right way to get back to you -- something with a bang, I thought, something that'll melt your heart, something that'll WOW you, something special -- and in trying to do that, I ended up with nothing. Every time I thought I had found the right thing to write about, something epic, I always think that it might just not be good enough and so I let it go and keep waiting for the RIGHT one.
As you can see from my lack of posts, I haven't found it.
I always attributed it to my lack of time, to my endless to-do lists, to my busyness, to whatever I thought were important distractions, and that if something were truly special enough, it'll transcend those distractions, make itself felt, enough so, that I won't have any excuse to let it go -- I will have to sit myself down and translate it into writing.
Patiently Waiting. That's what I liked to call it. And I've been doing it for so long that I realized I no longer know what I'm waiting for, if I ever did know to begin with.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that it's sembreak, I finally have the time to sit still and think, something I've been craving for since the whirlwind of YL6 took hold of my life on the first week of class. I have never truly appreciated the beauty importance of being able to stop just listen to myself.
I can't promise to be epic, to wow you, to be special, because I no longer know what that truly means -- it can mean being crazily spontaneous all the time for some people; or make calm, calculated decisions for others; or to focus on the important tangible aspirations of a few; or to lose yourself in the abstract world of your thoughts. But I will be me, that'll just have to do.
Words. funny how they can say something but mean something truly different for every reader, even nonsense to others (what I probably sound like right now). haha
I wanted to find the right way to get back to you -- something with a bang, I thought, something that'll melt your heart, something that'll WOW you, something special -- and in trying to do that, I ended up with nothing. Every time I thought I had found the right thing to write about, something epic, I always think that it might just not be good enough and so I let it go and keep waiting for the RIGHT one.
As you can see from my lack of posts, I haven't found it.
I always attributed it to my lack of time, to my endless to-do lists, to my busyness, to whatever I thought were important distractions, and that if something were truly special enough, it'll transcend those distractions, make itself felt, enough so, that I won't have any excuse to let it go -- I will have to sit myself down and translate it into writing.
Patiently Waiting. That's what I liked to call it. And I've been doing it for so long that I realized I no longer know what I'm waiting for, if I ever did know to begin with.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that it's sembreak, I finally have the time to sit still and think, something I've been craving for since the whirlwind of YL6 took hold of my life on the first week of class. I have never truly appreciated the beauty importance of being able to stop just listen to myself.
I can't promise to be epic, to wow you, to be special, because I no longer know what that truly means -- it can mean being crazily spontaneous all the time for some people; or make calm, calculated decisions for others; or to focus on the important tangible aspirations of a few; or to lose yourself in the abstract world of your thoughts. But I will be me, that'll just have to do.
Words. funny how they can say something but mean something truly different for every reader, even nonsense to others (what I probably sound like right now). haha
No comments:
Post a Comment
Have something to say? It'd be nice to hear it.